Ms. Kitty: The Maid

When it’s time to make the bed I’m rarely alone because it is one of Ms. Kitty’s favorite games. She is as much help as a two-year-old. If I am spreading the covers in the morning, she sits on top of them. She weighs about fifteen pounds, and it is difficult to smooth the wrinkles with her riding on top. If I am changing the sheets and throw the sheet up to trap air, Ms. Kitty is under it in a flash and it settles on top of her. I then have a large lump under the covers that remains there until the chore is finished. The sham pillows on the head of the bed provide more fun. She dives under them and hides, all but her tail. When this game is over the pillows often end up on the floor. Recently, she has discovered how to get into the bed by coming up under the covers from the foot of the bed and out the side. She doesn’t need me for this trick. It’s a one cat show.

Ms. Kitty loves to sit on top of it, it doesn’t matter what it is. It could be a piece of clothing tossed on the bed, a piece of paper dropped on the floor, the top of my lap top computer when closed, the suitcase I am packing, or the end table with the lamp that she examines occasionally and rubs her chin on the shade.

While packing for a recent trip I shut the lid of the suitcase, but didn’t zip it shut. When I came back into the room several pieces of clothing were on the floor, and Ms. Kitty was gone. If the suitcase is empty, she loves to get inside and make herself comfortable.

Ms. Kitty has mastered the art of looking innocent after an adventure. Her only punishment is a squirt of water from a spray bottle. All I have to do is show her the bottle, or imitate the noise it makes, and she is gone!

Ms. Kitty is now napping on top of the tall curio case, and like the mother with the two-year-old, it is time for me to rest too!

Ms. Kitty and Her Lint Roller

Ms. Kitty is very loving, but only if it’s her idea. She doesn’t come when called. She knows her name and turns and looks at me, and her ears move but she doesn’t come. If I can’t find her, or I want her in my lap, all I have to do is tear a sheet off of the lint roller and she appears. One of her favorite things is to be rolled with the lint roller. It collects loose hair and massages her at the same time. This would be a good thing, but in order to use the lint roller on myself I have to stand up, and then she complains that I am using her lint roller! To stop her from doing something I make a noise like a spray bottle, and she is gone!

The ping-pong table is in the carport. When Ms. Kitty hears a game being played, she sits in the window or the door, and complains because she hears her ping-pong balls bouncing and she can’t get them (she considers them all hers).

I bought a large bag of cat food, and left it in the trunk of the car for safe keeping for two days. I was waiting for the large plastic container I keep her food in, to empty. I brought the bag into the kitchen and left the room for about five minutes. When I returned Ms. Kitty had made a hole in the top of the bag large enough to insert her head, and she was crunching food. I didn’t realize how fast and proficient she had become at this task.

I have just returned from a four day vacation, and Ms. Kitty was happy to see me. While loving me she walked over the keyboard of my laptop as I was typing this entry. This is something she does often when she wants attention.

I like to have a glass of milk in the evening, and Ms. Kitty gets beside me and sits up like a dog. She reaches toward the glass with both paws motioning for me to move it closer. She tries to pull the glass to her so she can see into it. I give her a teaspoon of milk and she drinks it, but she doesn’t really like it. She just wants to see what I’m having.

The floor is the place for anything and everything Ms. Kitty can bat with her paw. She sits on top of the refrigerator and reaches down the sides and knocks the magnets and notes off. Pens and pencils are not to be left on the desk or table for writing, but are there for entertainment so Ms. Kitty can watch them hit the floor. At night I am careful to put my eyeglasses in a drawer for fear she may get them.

I rent a bedroom to two ladies, and when I go away they take care of Ms. Kitty. The older lady was concerned when she found cupboards and drawers left open. I assured her that Ms. Kitty was the prowler and often opens cupboards. The drawer in the bathroom cabinet rolls open very easily, and if not completely shut, she inserts her paw and pulls it open. However, after investigating the contents, she does not close the cabinet or the drawers.

Ms. Kitty gets into the cupboard in the bathroom where I keep the towels and wash clothes, and leaves them looking like a cyclone has passed through. The linen cupboard in the hall is very deep, and I keep a rubber band around the knob handles so she can’t open it. When she sees me open it, she comes like a flash and jumps in. If I don’t catch her quickly, she goes to the back, out of reach and has a nap. Thankfully, the dish cupboards all have catches that require a thumb to open them!

My Ms. Kitty

I don’t like to go out in the late afternoon, but Stater Brothers market was advertising pork spare ribs for 99¢ a pound, and I wanted to take advantage of the bargain. I guess a lot of other people wanted to do the same because they were all out of pork and offered me a rain check.

When I got back to my car there was a young market employee collecting baskets. She was petting a beautiful, friendly kitten. The kitten had a dark back, a white belly, and was about six months old. The young women encouraged me to take her. The family poodle had died of old age a couple of months earlier and I had an opening for a pet. Lacking a proper cat carrier I bravely put her in my car and hoped for the best. She was a little frightened and so was I. We both arrived home safely, and she stayed hidden in the kitchen until the next day.

I didn’t know it, but I was in for many new experiences!

One of Ms Kitty's early adventures included coughing and hardly being able to meow. Because I was new to the game and naive, I thought she might have a hair ball. After a couple of weeks I searched for my needle and thread, and when I failed to fine it, I took Ms Kitty to the vet. The needle was lodged in her throat, but the tread was within reach. By putting the cat to sleep the doctor was able to extract it without surgery. The next trip to the vet was to have her spade.

After paying the vet bill, and buying a cat condo, and a self cleaning cat box, my free cat began to feel like less that a bargain. The bill was now over $600.00 and I quit counting.

Because I live on a busy street, and have lost pets to the fast moving traffic, I decided that she would be an inside cat. Ms Kitty doesn’t understand, and often escapes, and gives me a work out trying to catcher her. Catching her often requires the help of the young men that are my neighbors.

While an alarm system was being installed, the workman went into the basement, and so did Ms Kitty. From there she was able to get under the house, and came up covered in dirty spider webs and dirt. The workman went into the attic, and left his ladder in the hall, and Ms Kitty went up the ladder and explored the attic, and collected more spider webs.

Over the basement stairway there is a storage space, and this time Ms Kitty went up and fell through a drop ceiling to the laundry room floor.

One of the bedrooms has a small open vent in the top of the closet. Ms Kitty was missing and we could hear her mewing in the kitchen, but couldn’t find her. There she was looking down through a vent in the ceiling over the kitchen stove and asking for help. My grandson, Bryan, suffers from a cat allergy, but he bravely coaxed her to come to the opening in the hall ceiling and got her down.

Ms Kitty sometimes dashes through open doors unnoticed. Owing to this practice she was trapped in the walk-in pantry for four hours while I was away. A new box of cat litter was stored in the pantry. It was in a heavy plastic bag inside a cardboard box. Ms Kitty opened the box and the bag, and used the litter. On a different day she once again got trapped in the pantry. This time she opened a plastic container of dry cat food and had a meal.

Ms Kitty loves to be up high. She sits on top of the refrigerator, climbs to the top of the living room windows, and her favorite napping spot is currently on top of the tall doll curio case. She sharpens her claws on the top of the wooden doors.

I had a white dove that I had rescued from a flock of crows that were attacking her. She was injured and I was able to pick her up. She became very tame and refused to leave when given the opportunity. I kept her in a large rectangular cage. Ms Kitty would lie on top of the cage and reach down trying to touch the dove. Because the dove had eggs she would charge the cat and the cat would retreat. Since cats and birds mix like oil and water, I gave the bird to a neighbor.

For a while Ms Kitty loved to play with a string dangling from a gas filled balloon. Her next toys of choice was ping pong balls, dozens of ping pong balls. They could be found under the strove, under the refrigerator, behind the book cases, behind the organ or any where else they could fit. Her current interest is in a laser beam. She will chase it back and forth across the room, but after a while she figures out that it is coming back, and she just lies in the center of the room and waits for it to return.

I have recently started to knit, and Ms Kitty is fascinated with the yarn. She sneaks up and gets it in her mouth, and we have a tug-of-war that she is determined to win.

When it’s nearing my bed time she sits in front of me, looks into my eyes, and mews when she thinks its time for bed. I slept late yesterday, and she sat by my head mewing for me to get up. In the night she sometimes finds my hand and puts her head in it to be scratched. She often flops down by my pillow, and I find her tail brushing my nose.

She is a wonderful companion and entertainer. There is rarely a dull day with Ms Kitty, and I am grateful to be her human.